Dave, Fist of Odin
Remember - I've got the Beatboxing NWP which gives a plus one to anyone I'm rapping behind.
Just wanted to make sure everyone was on the same page. I intend to be:
Like a sure shot
Going all the way down
Take it to the top
Get the room hot
Until the break of dawn
Alright, Bring It On
Okay, you guys wake up the morning of the big battle. Marivhon, uh, eats some chicken. Dave FoO beats up some guys, and Brogg goes for a run. Then you head on over to the Triple C Brewrey.
There's a huge crowd there. You find the signup table- it looks like there are over a hundred entries! Someone pay 10 gp to sign up your team... you'll also need a group name for registration.
The battling begins at noon and will continue on til the break of dawn. At first, there'll be no direct battling, you just have to show off your skills. Then the judges will pick the finalists and you'll get to the meat of the contest. But first you wait around for a few hours, then get called up on stage.
Dave FoO brings a love elemental, which is totally spot on, great thinking there. Love Elemental stats are below. The crowd, uh, loves it. Dave FoO starts it up with his lyrics.
You guys got anything else to show the judges? Huh? Well do you?
No. Appearing: 1
% In Lair: 10%
Treasure Type: Nil
# Attacks: 0
Special Abilities: Love, love, love
Psionic Ability: Nil
Baby, please. You know I ain't gonna do you no harm. I got what you need. Just come on over. Yeah. Oh yeah.
Hey Marivhon I was wondering if you have ever read The Fall
it was actually called La Chute in French it's a really good book just kidding.
So if we're doing this real time...well. Marivhon gets out of bed at 4pm. Let's just say he like me has A chickens leg and thigh for breakfast with a cup of coffee, yes with Omara's. Well I'm not sure that Marivhon should drink Omara's, he only has a 4 con, but it's done. Did you guys ever see Oceans 12, well sure it did suck that's true, but the point is that the French genius thief gets ready to do his big heist he has this cool scene where he's all flexible and doing like weird one armed handstands all bent over weird, then he totally springs up and it's like way cool, I don't think they used wires either, maybe it was a stunt double. I don't know but it was pretty sweet. Well basically Marivhon does that but since Marivhon is not some fucking french actor/wanker Little Mar does it better. Then he smokes some Gregolas blend.
Dave, Fist of Odin
Wow - Brogg and I are very different sorts of priests, with very different sorts of preps.
I wake up around noon, hungover; throw up, rinse out my mouth, and have two mugs of ale for breakfast. Then I get in a fistfight with someone, do a couple of shots, and take a nap.
Then maybe a cup of coffee and a whole chicken for dinner, wasked down with a couple of 40s.
Good to go!
('Cuz I'm Dave, Fist of Odin - D-D-Dave!
Yeah I'm Dave, Fist of Odin
And I'm bringing it down
I got mad skilz
You rap like a clown.
Here we go Here we go
And our style makes you frown
Cuz you know
That our flow
Is the freshest around.)
So - Brogg, Cinder, Marivhon, Renwick - what's the plan, here?
I say we come in with a BANG - get Renwick to bust some burning hands, I'll get a love elemental or something - start juicin' the crowd. Maybe one-by-one we rap our introductions while Marivhon breaks it down on the floor, and then I'll beat-box behind a three part Renwick/Cinder/Brogg rhyme.
Believe you me, when I box the beats they stay boxed. You feel me? Well you will when I hit some of those base notes. Mmm-Hmm!
I suppose I could even animate some skeletons to get a weird shuffling chorus line behind us, but that could go horribly awry, depending on the judges.
I think we've got the skilz to do some back-n-forthing with those chummers - they bust something, and we come back with a topper, until finally they cave in and admit that, yes, our stylez are the freshest, or skilz are the maddest, and we are just, in general, better human beings than they are.
'Cuz I'm Dave, Fist of Odin -
Who he say?
Fist of Odin!
If you're messin
Then I'm guessin'
That it's time to begin
With a clobber to your head
From our rhymz that'll win.
Cold Cut Collective, yo!
Let's get this show started. I take an early morning run along the beach in my Durth Community College hoodie. -You can see my breath in the crisp dawn air.
I then do some pushups and stuff and drink a raw egg or two.
I am focused.
Cinder high fives Brogg. "HAHAHA! Word on that!"
I am Brogg. I do not understand what you mean by real time
. My time is real
Or do DM's have the most real
time? Is that what you are trying to say? "Oh, I am God
, oh, my time is so real
! Not like those silly characters and their silly fake
time!" -Like I am supposed to be in freaking suspended animation
or something until someone posts...
I have plenty of things to do between now and Friday, thank you. Plenty of real
Smell you at the Cold Cut
The rap battle will occur this weekend in real time, so begin sharpening those... those rhymes. I'll kick it off Friday night, and we'll just hang out here on the blog for the next few days until then.
Brogg, M1k takes your stuff and says thanks, and tells you that he'll try to bring up his participation grade next time.
And yeah, you guys have been getting xp. Renwick, for example, now has 1800 xp. Pretty close to leveling. None of the rest of you are close. Do well in the rap battle, and who knows?
Yea what he said!
Lets see some xp!
Didn't you guy's notice that?
Am I the only one who notices these things? So of course we didn't level after the shadow mage and his homeboy because we didn't get any experience. So we can't. Should we get exp from that? I think so, but I'm not the GM. I trust him though, so it's probably just an oversight dear reader, so don't worry I'm sure he will fix that in his next post. As for more immediate concerns. I will hang out for the rap battle, of course. I will be the dancer for the party. I have a shit ton of break dance related skills and will show them off. If you doubt me then google Le parkour and the you can apologize for your ignorance.
Dave, Fist of Odin
A Zombie with a Chainsaw. Sweet!
Hey - what info do we have about the rap battle coming up? Themes, Stylz, dirt on the enemy, etc?
I imagine I'll be doing a lot of back-up, with my beat-boxing NWP, but maybe we could work on some multi-part thing. Any ideas? I have some ideas for something tentatively called "Marivhon - a monk's progress" about going from sucky to not-so-sucky, and then verging on sweet, and progressing in the future to badass. I'll post something Wednesday about it. When's the battle? I suspect that some sort of heavenly avatar or my guardian angel or some shit like that is going to be a little busy until then, and may not post.
And remember, I'm a bass. No, not like the fish. It's pronounced differently, like base.
No, I don't know why.
Yes, like the bass guitar, not the bass fish.
Yes, the Popeil pocket fisherman was sweet.
No, I lost mine, but I've got some bids on G-bay.
Man, I feel pretty bad about Mike the Zombie 1k not having any weapons or armor. I'll get him a suit of leather when we get to Port Fflar, maybe a black suit with red flames... -And a cool helmet with horns or something. I also give him my Magic Chainsaw +1. I tell him that it's sort of like a Broadsword, and Unearthed Arcana
says that he can use one of those. It has 17 charges left.
Yeah, you look pretty badassed now, Mike the Zombie 1k.
I spend the next few days before the Cold Cut Collective taking the public transportation between Port Fflar and Fflar Heights, writing lyrics on my notepad. -Thinking about the two worlds and stuff.
I'll drop a C-note on Mike the Zombie 1k's armor
and our lodging.
Back To Town
Okay, you head back to Port Fflar. It takes a little less than a week, and you hole up in another inn room and await the Cold Cut Collective rap battle, that's about two days away. Everyone cough up at least 3 gp for lodging.
Anyone wanna do anything before we start this up? You have a couple days. And no one levelled, although Renwick is close. Remember, it takes 2501 xp to hit 2nd level magic-user.
Brogg, you talk to Mike 1k about his lack of participation in the battles. He tells you that it's no big deal, but you guys look like you're handling things pretty good down there. I mean, if Renwick and Marivhon were getting xp just for hanging out and not doing much when they were low level, he figures there's no real incentive for getting in there and fighting if he'll just get xp anyway. Besides, he's got this real good book he's working on. Don't worry, he'll do the next battle. Well, not the rap battle. But the battle after that. As long as it's not against clerics or something. He doesn't have any weapons or armor, too, so you know, going last in combat and swinging with a fist, not so great.
Yeah, we have to school John Romeo.
Let's head back to Port Fflar and go to the Triple C brewery. After we show Romeo just who he is F'n with, we could head back and open one of the creepy demon doors. Who knows, maybe Renwick has gots Mad Skillz
Maybe someone is close to leveling?
Not Mike the Zombie 1k, for sure. On the way back, I have a talk with Mike the Zombie 1k. I think that the whole episode of being turned into Vrill's scarecrow has affected the guy. -I see if he wants to talk about it. Not prying or anything.
Okay Dave FoO, you heal Marivhon and all high-tail it out of there. Renwick, you find a black iron bracer where the shadow mage used to be.
As the sun comes up, you flee the City of Spiders for the hill above. Camping there, you rest for two nights and everyone's healed to full with new spells. The key and black iron bracer radiate magic. The key does not open the stone chest.
Hey, isn't there a rap battle in Port Fflar coming up really soon now?
Dave, Fist of Odin
I grab Marivhon, and leave the room. Then I bust a cure on our unconcious monk friend - BR 5, for 6hp back. HP check?
And where are we, now? We left the arena to a place that was unfamiliar, and now that it's dawn I'm wondering if we're back in spidertown, or elsewheresville, or what . . .
I've had a lot of bopping around to strange places lately, you see. It doesn't bother me particularly; as long as I have things to clobber, drink, or rap, and a stalwart band of companions to do the above with, the 'where' isn't so important.