Hi guys. Japan is lovely. Typhoon coming.
Anyway, Paris Hilton is summoned.
No. Appearing: 1
HD: 1 - 1
% In Lair: 10%
Treasure Type: F
# Attacks: 0
Special Abilities: obliviousness, shock value
Alignment: Chaotic neutral
Psionic Ability: immune
Paris Hilton is basically unbelievable. She's totally impervious to everything, and anyone around just really can't believe that someone like this made it this far. But it happened, and she's here, and now we all just sort of have to move on. Weapons and magic and crap don't affect her.
Opponents stare in disbelief or turn away in disgust until Paris gets bored and wanders off 1d4 rounds later. For the next round, opponents all talk about it like "Damn, was that really Paris Hilton? God she looks rough." "Yeah, no shit. Maybe she'll find a better life in girl prison." "Or with Jesse." "You mean 'Jesus'?" "Yeah, right, 'Jesus'."
Okay, but it's dark, so unfortunately Paris's great powers don't really apply. Paris Hilton basically sucks in the dark. Maybe next round you'll bring in that badger instead.
Ahoy! It's comedy gold here on DiD tonight!
Theo? It's completely black. You do a darn fine job of Hiding in Complete Darkness. You're like the fucking invisible guy from Fantastic Four.
KT, you bring the heat on STARDEVIL. He yells and drops with a thud.
No response on the CB... still static.
"Methinks YOU have the APPLE NOW BITCH," yells Reginald. He Magic Missiles you for 10 hp KT. Still pitch black though. Casting...
Labels: that was a long setup for an average paris hilton joke