The Black Van
KT, you see some blood right there at the entrance to your building, but not much else. Scouting around, the spiderbot detects from fresh tire skidmarks and smells some diesel.
You ask a nearby hooligan what they've seen. He tells you that four pigs jumped out of a black van and beat up this scraggly looking gnome, and kept calling him 'Princess'. They dragged him into the van and it sped off into the city.
You do remember hearing a horn honk just before Guard 4 left the building.
...
Sorry KT, you're a bit late to get the gun. Guard 4 picked it up before he fled. The Captain's other stuff is still here though, like his silver longsword etc.
...
Dag, okay, you drop some Cures. People are feeling okay but not physically great. Oddly, everyone mentally feels great. There's something weird about the Princess. Just being around her improves your mood and confidence. In fact, being around her grants everyone one level. That's above and beyond what you just got from experience, but note that Magical Princess Levels aren't permanent, it's only when you're around the Princess.
...
Meanwhile...
"OUCH"
"Ha ha, nice work Romeo. Looks like your hypothesis was made of fail. Now what?"
"I dunno, damn, do I look like the Captain? Let's just get some food and head back to the half-elf."
"Alright, we'll get some nachos. Nachos good?" Everyone nods.
...
Three of the four guards leave. The fourth guard, after a while, gets up to go to the john. While he's gone, Ambassador Bekkers spits out his gag.
"Psst. Theodore." The Ambassador tries to get your attention.
"Well, you and your friends tried to screw me again. That's great. Now you and I are going to be carted back to Onze, and when someone with a brain finally gets around to looking at you, and realizes you're Not Actually The Fucking Princess, you'll be quickly killed. This stinks."
Labels: made of fail, magical princess levels, the half-elf