Cash Money Thanks for splitting the $ Brogg... gotta remember to give treasure in nicely divisible numbers.

The sword... huh. Well next poster, or whoever remembers... roll a d6:
1-2: Bastard sword
3-4: Broadsword
5-6: Long sword

There you have it. It's a +2 Nine Lives Stealer, already gots 3 lives inside.

The Shield is +2 Shield of PFEs.

The crown is a magic item. It's cursed, whoever wears it becomes King of Greyhelm and gets the Greyhelm family curse. 30,000 gp. BONUS.

...

ZOM-G's Chainsaw is stand-alone, but he's unwilling to part with it. You guys already have a chainsaw somewhere in the pary. Not a buzzsaw, full on tricked-out chainsaw. If you want the chainsaw, you gotta kill ZOM-G.

Tut, what are you going to upgrade your magic buzzsaw with? You gotta have magic to get magic, here.

ZOM-G will tell you a bit about the KoA:

YEH
THATS ME
KOA
REALLY RMC
READ MY HELMT K?
IT SEZ 'RMC'
THATS SOME CROATIAN DOOD
HE MADE US
MADE ME
...
IM PHASE II
KICKIN IT
...
WE COME FROM A WORLD YOU MAY NOT UNDERSTAND
ITS A MAGIC LAND PAST THE MIRROR U KNO?
IT SUX
HELLA SUX
NO LOLI
DO NOT WANT
...
SO HE DIED
THERES OTHERS TOO
ALL DEAD
"I SEE DED PEOPLE" LOL
BIG FUKKEN TOOMB
THATS THE LAND
SUX HUH?
YES IT DOES
...
HE WAS SAD OR SOMETING
TRYD TO GET W/ THS CHICK
BUT SHE WAS LIEK "NO WAI"
SO HE BECAME AN HERO
I THINK
OR MAYBE JUST DIED
HE WAS OLD
SOME OLD FAG
TOTAL WIZZARD
SPELLS ETC
SPELLCASTER
MAGIC-USER
TOTAL PEDO
THAT KIND
...
HE WAS ALL HOT 4 HER
BUT SHE RAN AWAY
CUZ HE SUX
N HE WAS LIKE "NOPE"
SO HE MADE US
GO FIND THAT BITCH
WELLL
IT FAILD
100%FAILGET
WE JUST WER LIKE
"THS BLWS"
ALL WE GOT
IS BIG SAWZ
SO LETS ROCK
...
SO WE DID
HERE WE R
U KNO?
ANYWAI THRE U GO
K THX
  ¶ 10:44 PM