5.19.2005
I'll Limerick You Too
Okay Cinder, you get note and broadsword.
You approach some bum and ask him where Haggis Place is. He looks at you quizzically and says "Uh, haggis? You want... you want sausage?" You and he have an awkward moment together. Then he says "Oh... Haggi's... HAY-gees... you wanna go to Haggi's Place!" He thinks real hard in that drunk sort of way, and manages to give you general directions. It's by a well in Helmetown, basically right in the middle of the Greyhelm slums. You give him 10 sp for the info.
Why not pick the beggar's pocket and get your money back! You reach in there... 1, 5, 10 sp... two strawberries... a pickle... Just kidding there buddy. You nab the pouch off a fat rich kid. 1d10+10 gp and 1d4 'tic-tacs'. Feelin' it, as you head over to Helmetown, you pilfer an orange off a fruit cart. YOU FIEND.
Helmetown. It's the walled-off slums district of any self-respecting medieval fantasy major city. Atop the gate to the rusty black cast-iron fence surrounding the slums are the words "HELMET TOWN", usually just slurred together to 'Helmetown'. We're talking whores on the corner, vomit on the street, over on your right is a guy getting 'shivved' over a bum game of dominoes. Good thing you brought your broadsword! The guards at the gate don't even look at you when you enter.
Finding Haggi's ain't hard. It's your classic scumbags' bar, complete with basement-level entrance. Poor lighting, reeks of beer and sweat, packed full of lowlifes. No one really seems to notice you enter, maybe a few shifty glances. You don't see anyone you recognize either. Over in the corner is where some of the action is- it's an ogre armwrestling a dwarf. They look drawn to a standstill, both exerting themselves. The ogre is silent but sweat is dripping off its brow. The dwarf is red in the face, huffing and puffing, and screaming incoherently at the ogre "I'll crush ya! I'll... I'll Smash ya! I'll LIMERICK YA! Arrrgg... I'll rip your GODDAMN ARM OFF!" He's clearly fucking nuts, but the crowd is loving it.
Anyway, your call if you're here with two clerics and two zombies, but I'm guessing you'll have come alone. What do you do?
You approach some bum and ask him where Haggis Place is. He looks at you quizzically and says "Uh, haggis? You want... you want sausage?" You and he have an awkward moment together. Then he says "Oh... Haggi's... HAY-gees... you wanna go to Haggi's Place!" He thinks real hard in that drunk sort of way, and manages to give you general directions. It's by a well in Helmetown, basically right in the middle of the Greyhelm slums. You give him 10 sp for the info.
Why not pick the beggar's pocket and get your money back! You reach in there... 1, 5, 10 sp... two strawberries... a pickle... Just kidding there buddy. You nab the pouch off a fat rich kid. 1d10+10 gp and 1d4 'tic-tacs'. Feelin' it, as you head over to Helmetown, you pilfer an orange off a fruit cart. YOU FIEND.
Helmetown. It's the walled-off slums district of any self-respecting medieval fantasy major city. Atop the gate to the rusty black cast-iron fence surrounding the slums are the words "HELMET TOWN", usually just slurred together to 'Helmetown'. We're talking whores on the corner, vomit on the street, over on your right is a guy getting 'shivved' over a bum game of dominoes. Good thing you brought your broadsword! The guards at the gate don't even look at you when you enter.
Finding Haggi's ain't hard. It's your classic scumbags' bar, complete with basement-level entrance. Poor lighting, reeks of beer and sweat, packed full of lowlifes. No one really seems to notice you enter, maybe a few shifty glances. You don't see anyone you recognize either. Over in the corner is where some of the action is- it's an ogre armwrestling a dwarf. They look drawn to a standstill, both exerting themselves. The ogre is silent but sweat is dripping off its brow. The dwarf is red in the face, huffing and puffing, and screaming incoherently at the ogre "I'll crush ya! I'll... I'll Smash ya! I'll LIMERICK YA! Arrrgg... I'll rip your GODDAMN ARM OFF!" He's clearly fucking nuts, but the crowd is loving it.
Anyway, your call if you're here with two clerics and two zombies, but I'm guessing you'll have come alone. What do you do?
